Thursday, July 26, 2007
Boredom Ensues...
- Keeping an immaculate home
- Watching every movie in my collection (I'm currently on #101 out of 125)
- Reading all of the comments on the infamous EDSBS post #1406 (had to stop at 400 for fear of insanity)
- Exercise *gasp!*
- Perusing message boards and the blogosphere to exhaustive lengths
- T. Kyle King's recent piece on DawgSports regarding the ongoing struggle with/against the media Death Star, espn.
- On top of doing a preview page for every team in D-1, SMQ is now in the midst of thoroughly breaking down each BCS conference and Pac-10 Week should be right around the corner.
- MGoBlog hosts the BlogPoll each season, which is like the AP but us sophisticated blogger types vote instead of the mainstream media folk. I've contacted the site about making tHOH eligible to vote but have heard no response so far. Preseason ballots should come out sometime in the next month and yes, I'll be totally biased for the Devils.
Not to leave without anything ASU-related, here's few nugs to keep you sedated for at least part of the next 36 days:
* The Sun Devils were picked to finish fourth in the Pac-10 preseason media poll, but who cares about the opinions and prognostications of writers before the season starts?
* Former ASU fullback Tex Wright, not to be confused with Randall "Tex" Cobb of Raising Arizona fame, is alive, well, and author of one of the all-time great ASU finishes that I'd never heard of before this week.
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* As poster "ENCINITASjon" of Devils Digest put it, here's "one of the dumbest articles you'll ever read." It's so bad it may get its own post here in a couple of days.
* Former Sun Devil basketballer and Sigma Nu douchebag Ron DuBois landed a job as an assistant coach with the NBA's Memphis Grizzlies. See Tucson, we do stuff in the NBA too.
* I started my own poll at Devils Digest since I don't know how to do it here. It asked readers to vote for how long it would take for the 35-44-1 all-time record vs. UA to get evened up. The vast majority of voters chose 11-15 years, but unfortunately some folks from down south got involved and it turned into an argument about semantics and the interpretation of the written word, then forever banished to the rarely visited smack board.
* Dennis Erickson inked his fourth signee of the 2008 recruiting class, local offensive lineman Patrick Jamison, who was suited by Erickson since his last name is a fantastic whiskey. Jamison also received scholarship offers from UCLA, Tennessee, Oregon State, Boise State, UNLV, and Arizona.
* Apparrently KTAR 620 was late to Pac-10 media day since they only have audio of Jim Harbaugh, Pete Carroll, and Karl Dorrell available on their website. Admittedly I was also late to link up to it, that's why I was looking. As soon as I can find a complete archived audio file of the proceedings I'll pick apart everything Dennis Erickson says and take a few pokes at Mike Stoops.
Labels: anecdotal evidence, ASU alumni, blog links, dirty icky recruiting, hatred for the 4-letter network, hoops, movie references, regular old crackers, rivalry rants, surrounded by morons, UA morons
An open roundtable from Trev
Your Home Field Advantage
Give the more zealous portion of your fanbase a religion. What's this cult following? Feel free to give the splitters a derogatory nickname.
We all bow to Frank Kush, the patron saint of Sun Devil football who was professionally crucified by those whom he had come to enlighten- a camp catalyzed by a false idol, none other than a flag-waving kicker. (as everyone knows, kickers are NOT football players) The congregation became disillusioned and dissolved in the following years by carpetbaggers such as Rodgers and Cooper, then demoralized by Marmie the incompetent. Savior Jake Plummer had come to restore joy to the desert, but by that time the barbarians of professional sport had fully infiltrated the holy land and many followers had converted to the dark side. Our sect became divided in recent years, falling into the camps of lovers and haters and split by one man's papacy, Dirk Koetter. Koetter was forced out after piss-poor performance and record-setting bad decisions, which allowed for the new savior to enter our church, one Dennis Erickson. In a throwback to the old testament of Kush, Erickson preaches ideas once thought to be antiquated, like a running game and a physical defense. Lovers and haters are reunited and hope is restored in Sun Devil Land as we wander through the desert, although not-so-aimlessly anymore.
If this piece doesn't get me into hell for violation of the 1st Commandment, nothing will.
Your biggest rival is in town, and College Gameday is coming....to your citaaaaaaay... Create a blatant corporate sellout promotion to appeal to the mass unwashed.
In the spirit of espn being onsite, Pat Tillman's death will be exploited to the grandest extent. Gold-colored Army Ranger berets will be administered to the first 50,000 attendees, the marching band does a patriotic 4th of July-style set at halftime, and there is a missing man flyover to accompany the fireworks after each Sun Devil score.
Add one local delicacy to your stadium's concessions. Post-tax pricing is optional.
Other than alcohol? For four bucks apiece, Filiberto's (or whatever it's called now) offers burritos made to order. The tortilla throwing tradition takes on a whole new level when players and cheerleaders start slipping on fresh-made guacamole, but Michael Crow puts the kibash on the whole thing after a male cheerleader dies when a chorizo and egg burrito funnels through a megaphone and asphyxiates him. Jan had spirit, yes he did...
With an unlimited AD budget, add or subtract one thing to your school's gameday experience that has nothing to do with football.
Lot 59 is replaced with sod, shade trees, and plumbing facilities because quite frankly we are light years behind the Southeastern schools when it comes to tailgating, mostly because spending all day on shadeless blacktop in 110+ degree heat is no one's good time. For extra income the former parking lot is a nine-hole, par-three golf course during the week and a 10-story parking megastructure is erected for regular student parking where the bullshit Alpha Drive fraternity houses once sat.(hollaback old school Adelphi row!) We can put it right next to the football team's brand spankin' new indoor practice facility.
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General NCAA questions
Coin a hilariously unrealistic stereotype that you would like to "make stick" for this upcoming season.
The Stoops regime is fired from Tucson and they moochingly move back into brother Bob's McMansion basement in Norman, all while trying to raise a young daughter/sissyboy. Think My Two Dads but with three guys, two of whom are gay. And a lot of strained-faced yelling.
Redesign your conference or independent schedule with reckless abandon. Be prepared to include compensation for jilted schools and conferences in your explanation.
Jeez this thing is getting long. The Pac-10 finally got it right with the full round-robin schedule, no need for me to go fucking with it. As for the OOC slate, I'd like to see the Sun Devils take on more teams in the northeast and upper midwest. ASU is so popular with non-athlete students that it offers virtual orientation in Philly, Chicago, and Seattle, and this desire to escape the miserable fucking cold of those God-forsaken places ought to be exploited for recruiting purposes. Imagine getting on a plane in lake effect snow-ridden Buffalo in February and landing in Tempe where it's 75 and sunny for an official visit, and now envision a behemoth 18 year-old signing on the dotted line.
Following up on your new realignment, blow up the BCS and devise a national playoff system, money grabs and missed exams be damned. Using your new fantasy conferences is optional.
The existing bowl games get used on a rotating basis as neutral sites for a 16-team playoff, and the ones that aren't selected for the bracket games can be held as exhibitions, like a football NIT. More traditional bowls like the Rose and Fiesta are used for the latter rounds and they rotate much like the BCS does now. I'd like to suggest that the current conferences be blown up and reorganized into equally sized divisions (while eliminting those bullshit conference championship games) for the purpose of selecting some of the participants in this proposed playoff, but that's just crazy talk.
Elect one public figure to replace NCAA president Myles Brand. Anyone with proper name recognition is eligible.
Charles Fucking Barkley, and I don't think I need to explain myself. Even though he's a basketball player, being from Alabama he should intuitively understand the importance of college football.
Be sure to check out others' responses in the comments section of FireMarkMay's original post.
Labels: anecdotal evidence, blog links, Dirk's a horse's ass, dirty icky recruiting, Greatest Fark Evah, movie references, Pac-10 business, QnA, tailgating, UA morons
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Premature Premonitions, Part III: The Schedule
You think you can do better? be my guest. At the end of the year I'll be sure to point out every one I get right and ignore every one I get wrong.
9/1, San Jose State: Former UA coach Dick Tomey has a knack for beating ASU and this will be closer than most think. Expect a tough defense, volumes of trick plays, and for this game to still be in doubt at halftime. SJSU was a bowl team last year, and after scaring the piss out of me the Devils will pull away in the second half. ASU by 17
9/8, Colorado: The Buffs went on the road last year and almost pulled off an upset at Georgia, but I think they're still playing intramurals, brother. Too much offense on our side of the ball and the crowd should be good. ASU by 21
9/15, San Diego State: SDSU returns 4 defensive starters from a 3-9 team. While that may help, it won't help enough against Ryan Torain and a senior-laden O-line. The defense should be starting to gel by now. ASU by 24
9/22, Oregon State: Nobody in Corvallis realizes how much they're going to miss departed QB Matt Moore. He was the heart and soul of the team that beat USC and I don't expect them to be in fighting shape by week four. ASU by 14
9/29, at Stanford: I can't believe the Devils haven't won a Pac-10 roadie in Cali since 1999. Coach Erickson has the team playing with confidence and Dirk Koetter is a distant memory. ASU by 30+
10/6, at Washington State: The first serious road trip will be close- it's WSU’s homecoming and QB Brink's a gamer. They have some quality receivers but their run game is a bit suspect. ASU by 7
10/13, Washington: Trap game! ASU returns home at a 6-0 mark and there's a buzz building around town causing the best crowd of the year. UW will be anywhere from 2-3 to 0-5 and hungry for a win. If Dirk's still coaching this is a loss. ASU by 13
10/27, Cal: The Devils will be fresh off of a bye week and seeking redemption after last year's embarassment in Berkeley, but ASU's secondary + DeSean Jackson = bad news, even on Homecoming. Cal by 4
11/3, at Oregon: I'm not sold on QB Dennis Dixon despite last year's statstical beat down in Tempe (lots of screen passes that went long) and Coach Belotti will probably be shuffling Leaf the younger in by this point in the season. ASU by 9
11/10, at UCLA: 20 returning starters for the Bruins, holy freaking God. Their strength last year was the run D and that won't change. Expect Torain to have his worst day of the year. UCLA by 12
11/22, USC: Arizona State has a hard time getting a good crowd on Thanksgiving Day and it's freakin' USC. The young Trojan talent is firing on all cylinders by now and the tryptophan leaves the Devils flat. USC by 27
12/1, Arizona: The premier matchup will be UA's defense against ASU's offense, but the game will be decided by Air-izona vs. the Devil D. If concussion prone Willie Tuitama still has his head on his shoulders by week 12, the kittycat offense will be decent but not good enough. ASU will be trying to save face after two consecutive losses and Erickson won't let them come out flat. ASU by 10
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Once again we’re the best of the rest of the Pac-10 at 9-3. We still don’t have the horses to run with the big boys but we’re not beating ourselves against the other dwarves. With this schedule we should be better but it’ll take a minor miracle to run through the final five games with two or fewer losses. The only chance is that the players adapt and buy into Erickson’s schemes quickly and all of the outstanding questions are answered with good fortune.
Bowl game, Nebraska: Sam Keller throws for 600+ yards and 6 TD's in a Husker rout. He then goes into the stands and fucks half of ASU's women, yet mysteriously all women present become pregnant and give birth to coked-up, rocket-armed cyborgs that destroy the earth. Far fetched, yes, but it's as close to anyone's bowl prediction made before fall camp.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, drugs, Pac-10 business, the new era, UA morons, we're sorry Sam Keller
Monday, July 23, 2007
Premature Premonitions, Part II: Defense & Special Teams
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CB- Ah, the fun begins. Shockingly enough Keno Walter-White will be missed because nobody seems capable of starting at the number two corner sport. The good news is that Justin Tryon is as close to a lock-down corner as anyone at ASU in the last few years, even though the folks at Cal don’t care for him too much. Chad Green’s unfortunate car accident affects the depth chart but he was one of several that simply shouldn’t make the cut as a starter. Chris Baloney was the hero against NAU in last year’s opener, getting a pick-6 that sealed the win. Nagging injuries throughout the 2006 season kept his productivity down but he appears to be the best of the rest. Help could be on the way in the form of true frosh Omar Bolden, a highly touted recruit that has yet to be academically approved by the NCAA clearinghouse. Many believe that he possesses the physical tools to play corner in the Pac-10 right away, but the phrase ”counting the chickens before they’ve hatched” comes to mind. Travis Smith, Litrele Jones, Grant Crunkleton, and JuCo transfer Jarrell Holman will also be in the mix as back-ups.
Safety- Josh Barrett is racking up tons of preseason accolades and will be the anchor in the secondary. The departure of Zach Catanese leaves the other spot wide open but this looks like the best defensive unit on the team. I thought that Ryan McFoy’s solid play last year would be enough to garner the starting free safety spot but one of Dennis Erickson’s first actions this spring was moving him to linebacker. He did so because of the emergence of Troy Nolan, the defensive MVP of spring camp who will be in close competition for the starting spot with Jeremy Payton. Returnees Rodney Cox and Angelo Fobbs-Valentino will provide back up support while true freshmen Colin Parker and Oliver Aaron may see the field in case of injury.
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The defensive unit as a whole is a giant question mark. Teams with multiple high-quality receivers (Cal, USC) will give the corners fits but the biggest question is at defensive line with all of the unproven players. The ability to pressure the opposing quarterback while rushing only four was the key to defensive success last year and problems typically occurred when the corners and safeties cheated in to help with the run leaving the DB’s in single coverage. As crazy and forward-thinking as it sounds, the ability to control the line of scrimmage will be paramount in the success of the Devil D. The early season schedule is soft enough that the team should be working together and picking up schemes by the time conference play begins. A longstanding issue in Tempe has been that the caliber of defensive players under Dirk Koetter was not up to the level of their conference foes. Better players were being recruited in the last two years and there was marked improvement from 2005 to 2006, but the personnel issue still remains: does ASU have the horses to run with USC, et. al?
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I'll take a look at the schedule and make a few predictions in Part III, which will be up within a couple of days.
Labels: ASU alumni, Dirk's a horse's ass, dirty icky recruiting, the new era
Friday, July 20, 2007
Premature Premonitions, Part I: The Offense
Does Dennis Erickson still have the magic?
Will the players respond well to the new staff?
How bad will we miss Kyle Caldwell and Jordan Hill?
Which Rudy C. will show up?
Will Omar Bolden qualify academically?
Will anyone plug the gushing dike that is the #2 corner position?
Have the receivers learned how to run routes?
Can Josh Barrett live up to the hype?
Having said that, here goes.
The Offense
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RB- Ryan Torain has a lot of JR Redmond in him and he fits the mold of other successful Erickson RB’s like Steven Jackson and Ken Simonton, big guys with cutting ability that can catch the ball well out of the backfield. Torain’s gaining a lot of praise this offseason including making scout.com’s All-American 1st team, so living up to the hype is as critical as staying healthy. There’s plenty of talent waiting in the wings in the somewhat forgotten Keegan Herring, who has better breakaway speed and cutting ability than Torain but lacks the physicality to consistently run up the middle. Dmitri Nance is small in size but has a knack for picking up the tough short yards and always manages to fall forward. Nance was highly decorated but slowly recruited in Texas high school football and he may be playing with something to prove. Many are excited to see what he can do if given consistent carries but, barring injuries, that probably won’t happen until at least next year.
TE/H-back- Losing Zach Miller to the NFL was huge but not all hope is lost. Older brother Brent is back for a senior season and was solid as a blocker while consistent as a receiver. There isn’t much experience behind him but there is unproven talent. Florida transfer Dane Guthrie has yet to make an impact, Andrew Pettes was the other top TE signed with Zach Miller but has done next to nothing, and Jovon Williams and Lance Evbuomwan are young but physically gifted. Someone in addition to Brent Miller will need to earn their keep as Dennis Erickson likes to use a two-TE set on a regular basis.
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OL- Zach Krula’s reception of a 6th year of eligibility is huge and should offset the loss of team leader and three-year starter Andrew Carnahan. Krula was a road-grading tackle that was a big part of the early season success in 2005 against Temple, LSU, and Northwestern but he hasn’t played since due to a broken ankle. Big Zach lines up next to five other guys that have more than seven starts apiece thanks to a host of injuries over the last few years, something that can hopefully be remedied through a new training staff. Seniors Mike Pollak an Brandon Rodd are the anchors at center and left tackle, while Julius Orieukwu, Robert Gustavis, and Paul Fanaika have all filled in well. Run blocking should be a strength this year and sack statistics should go down in the new shotgun formation. In addition to Carnahan, the unit lost Leo Talovou to personal reasons, Stephen Berg to graduation, and Saia Falahola to the defensive line. The top seven guys are very good but if the injury bug strikes as hard as it has in the past the offense could be in big trouble. Backups with game experience include Richard Tuitu’u, Thomas Altieri, Shawn Lauvao.
Defense, Special Teams, and a schedule forecast will make up parts II and III. See you next week, you poor depraved soul.
Labels: Rudy Fucking Burgess, the new era
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Bring it on, spammers
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* Due to some nagging by a couple of friends, the comments section no longer requires that pesky registration. You may still have to decipher the squiggly word, but that's blogger's doing and not mine. If you any love/hate letters for me that you don't want made public, my email address is now available in my profile. Actually I'm reserving the right to publish whatever you send me, so just forget about those naked pictures you've been saving for a great post (not that it's a real problem here).
* The new commercial is here! The new commercial is here! Yay night games.
* Mike Stoops thinks the Rose Bowl is "a lot more attainable" this year, and he didn't say it all tongue-in-cheek like the infamous comments about getting Tucson Tech to the National Title in year three. Year three was last year, oh by the way.
* I decided to make a shirt for the U of A game. Go get 'em now, before the Thanksgiving weekend rush!
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***they're not actually for sale anywhere.***
Labels: anecdotal evidence, regular old crackers, UA morons
Friday, July 13, 2007
The State of A-State
A 10th place finish in the Director's Cup standings, although weighted heavily by consistent success across the Olympic(non-important) sports, is a reason to have faith. Rob Evans and Dirk Koetter are out. Pat Murphy(College World Series), Charli Turner-Thorne(Sweet 16), and Clint Myers(WCWS) are staying put. Herb Sendek and Dennis Erickson are in.
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The Director's Cup finish is of little consequence unless one examines the company in which ASU sits. Zeiger puts it well:
ASU is expected to reach the $40-million revenue mark in fiscal year 2008. [athletics director Lisa] Love said that $50 million in annual funds is most ideal, yet realistic.
She looks at the Directors’ Cup standings and marvels that her school was in the top 10 with Texas ($97.8 million revenue in 2005-06), Florida ($82.4 million) and Michigan ($85.5 million). ASU finished four spots ahead of Ohio State, which had the nation’s largest ’05-06 revenue at $104.7 million.
“We are incredibly, competitively efficient,” Love said. “Now, you can’t help but dream. What could our university do (with Ohio State money)?”
Holy freaking smokes. This leads to the chicken vs. egg argument about Sun Devil athletics- do we win to create revenue or do we spend extra money to get more wins? This is also alluded to in the Trib article, making mention of Koetter's famous departing quote regarding the perception/reality of ASU and Zeiger hints that it may have to do with financial competitive advantage based on a smallish and somewhat apathetic fan base. Also cited is the example of George Mason, who after their 2006 Final Four run had a 20% increase on freshman admission applications and a 25% increase in athletic donations.
How does this affect football? Gymnastics coach John Spini says that morale at ASU is the best it's been during his 27 years in Tempe. Morale makes for a happy place, which makes it easier to recruit. A new coach has invigorated the fan base and created a buzz around town. We won't be punting late in the game when we're behind. A schedule with 8 home games can't hurt, especially when seven of them are guaranteed to be at night. Season tickets for those 8 home dates start at $99, and a happy fan base donates money and creates a bigger fan base which makes it easier to recruit. A butterfly flaps it's wings and so on...
Basketball still gets a pass since they can still only go one direction, but Sendek seems to have laid the foundation for on-court success and local support. The uber-recruits coming to Wells Fargo Arena this season can't hurt either, and while getting excited about recruits is usually reserved for the folks in Stoopsville remember that new blood turns basketball around much quicker than football.
Life seems to be good in Tempe, but as usual it will all come down to winning on Saturdays in the fall. The schedule plays in ASU's favor to gain some early confidence in themselves and for the Valley to get excited and show support before the meat of the schedule comes to town. Phil Steele thinks we have a good shot at starting 8-0, and if he says it it must be true. This is as much of a make-or-break year as ASU has ever had. The deck is stacked in Sparky's favor for once and it's time to put up or shut up. Now is the time to makes strides.
Labels: dirty icky recruiting, Greatest Fark Evah, hoops, other sports, Pac-10 business, the new era
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Possession Receiving at it's finest
Labels: ASU alumni
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
I guess they wanted to give South Korea a sporting chance
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Former University of Arizona head football coach John Mackovic will be leading a team of college football players to represent these United States in the 2007 American Football World Cup. Players will be taken from Divisions I, II, and III, including UA quarterback Adam Austin.
The roster is full of names you've never heard from schools you haven't heard of including Hobart, Morningside, and Virginia Tech. (too soon? -ed.) In the offensive overview, the career highlight mentioned with Austin is that he "was a part-time starter for the Wildcats during his career, leading the team to a victory over Stanford last season." Stanford, wow. Congratulations Adam, you have something in common with 92% the Cardinal's opponents.
I'd like to think that I was creative enough to come up with something like this, but it's real. For that sort of creativity in a college football blog, check out the Hayley LaFontaine story at EDSBS. I did a double check just to make sure this isn't an Onion-style article, but if it is a ruse then the authors were thorough enough to create a Team USA website with pictures and everything. Fear not fellow Americans, as S. Korea was defeated 77-0 on Tuesday and Team USA advances to face Germany on Saturday. Austin didn't perform well enough to get his name in the paper, but Macko's probably saving him for the Germans and their stout D. Mmmmm, German stout. I'm off to Leon Pub.
For extra summer reading, Sun Devil Pat ranked ASU's bowl victories on Cactus Ranch. It's not much, but it's something to distract you from behemoth recruit Po'u Palelei not qualifying academically. Remember folks, no offseason news is good offseason news when Dennis Erickson is your coach.
Labels: anecdotal evidence, blog links, message board nonsense, UA morons