Monday, February 11, 2008
When it rains it pours
Arizona State University: Makin' it rain on dem wildcat hoes since 1885.In light of getting swept by the Sun Devils in their beloved cash cow men's basketball, one would think this would be a good week for the University of Arizona to lie low and wait it out until softball season starts, but leave it to our good friend Jeff Metcalfe to pile it on when some piling needs doing. Metcalfe, the ASU beat writer for the Arizona Republic, has been the only Republic journalist that has treated ASU like a hometown team as long as I've been reading it (about a decade) and today may be his finest hour. We'll get to Jeff in a moment.
In a story that should have already died (thanks internet!), Mike Stoops used part of his signing day press conference to badmouth the recruits that originally pledged committments to UA but later switched to ASU. He also made sure to include a potshot about rival Arizona State and their academics, stating the following:
"Obviously Arizona State has turned into a JC, and we're a four-year college. According to all the players, they say it is easier to go to school there, easier to get in. I thought we had the same requirements."Wow. I've had a number of thoughts regarding the situation since it came out last Wednesday.
1. The academic requirements are identical at ASU, UA and NAU, as set forth by the Arizona Board of Regents.
This is true! There was such a large request for information after this story broke that the University posted two academic FYI articles on the official athletics website.
2. Every other team in the country is talking about the players they signed, how bad are yours that you're discussing the ones you lost?
Not great but it could have been worse. Stoops signed the top DB in the west in Robert Golden, but the overall class was ranked 39th by Rivals, 39th by Scout, and 32nd by espn. A 36.6 average out of 119 D1 teams sounds pretty good, but 36.6 out of the 66 BCS teams comes off as pretty meh, ranging somewhere near the 45th percentile. In a day based on potential where everyone wins, somehow Arizona loses.
3. Dennis Erickson fucking owns you.
Also true! Stoops got one of the top 18 recruits in the State of Arizona while Erickson got six. Also, DE is 1-0 against Stoops lifetime, and while one doesn't usually make a trend, you know it's a trend. By the way, ASU's recruiting class landed a ranking average of 20, good enough for the 70th percentile.
4. Koetter never even pulled any shit like this, you buffoon.
He hated the media, and the media hated him back. If Koetter had done something this stupid, you would have known about it. This means one very important thing: Koetter loses the "horse's ass" moniker, for Lord Stoops has rightfully claimed it as his own!
At least Stoops didn't punt during the presser.5. I bet those UA nutjobs will rally around him again, using JuCo! as a battle cry for years to come.
Example A. Example B, they chanted "J-C! J-C! J-C!" during Sunday's loss to ASU in hoops. Case closed.
6. What kind of a message does this send to Stoops' commits? Should they not be the star of the show?
The verdict's still out on this one since Tucson isn't exactly a hub of information or unbiased journalism.
7. What kind of a message does this send to the three players that switched commitments?
Which brings us to today's article by Jeff Metcalfe. I would make the entire thing my smartass subtitle at the top of the page, but Blogger has a character limit. Metcalfe took the time to interview RB Ryan Bass, WR Gerrell Robinson, and WR Jarell Barbour- the three big name recruits that spurned UA for ASU- to find out what they thought. Bring on the quotes! (emphasis mine)
Barbour said ASU associate athletic director Jean Boyd, is the "main reason why I'm there." Boyd directs ASU's academic support for football and other sports. "He sat me down and said this is what you need to do to be eligible to play football," said Barbour, who feels his comments were misused by Stoops.A note to Mr. Stoops: when you're in a hole, step #1 is to stop digging. Please cease and desist any and all digging immediately. We at ASU would like to see nothing more than a lengthy contract extension for you.
"He put my business out in the open. It was cruel. I didn't want to go there because their football team is horrible. They stunk it up bad. I didn't want to be a part of it. I want to be on a good football team that's going to go places."
Running back Ryan Bass of Corona (Calif.) Centennial also was expressed disappointment in Stoops: "I felt he was out of bounds with his comments. I hope he didn't make those comments because I switched to Arizona State. Everyone knows it's the same to get in. It didn't sit too well with me. I'm glad he (Stoops) apologized."
"I've worked too hard these past four years to say I have grade issues," said Robinson, who has a 3.0 grade-point average and 1490 SAT score that are good enough for admission to Notre Dame. "We all have reasons why we decommitted and why we committed in the beginning. We're 17- and 18-year-old kids. He's a grown man. You'd expect him to take the high road. If anything, you'd expect one of the three of us to say something like that, not the grown man in the situation.
"ASU has done nothing but help get Jarrell and Ryan on the right track. I don't think Arizona was adamant about doing that at all. I was there 15-20 times myself and never once saw anything about academics. It was poor judgment on my part (to initially commit to UA). ASU on junior day showed us around to all the educational categories they have."
Barbour also is more than ready for his first Territorial Cup.
"I can't remember the last time Arizona beat Arizona State," he said. "We're going to take it out on the field, and it's not going to be pretty. It'll be the best game of my life, I promise that."
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, dirty icky recruiting, hoops, message board nonsense, rivalry rants, surrounded by morons, the offseason sucks, UA morons, you have to see this
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Uhhhh....wha?
Everyone wants to be a superlative. Remember in high school when folks were proud of having their picture in the yearbook for class clown, cutest couple, and the like? Washington State coach Bill Doba apparently has his eye on "dumbest fucking coach on the planet." Dennis Franchione is taking poor coaching to another level by displaying ineffectiveness off the field, so Doba has also decided to step his game up because by golly, he wants to be remembered at the ten year reunion too. Come on down Bill, you savant:
Arizona is currently 1-3 against real teams, and don't give me that Appalachian State any given Saturday crap. With the exception of Cal the cats weren't playing the titans of the game either, posting losses to New Mexico in Tucson and at BYU.
Stupidity is punishible by many forms- pain, financial burden, or even a coaching stint in Jacksonville- but here's my suggestion for ASU to even the score, because being compared to Arizona football is an insult. I recommend the following final score on Saturday, photo style:
ASU
Wazzu
Take ASU, and the over. The spread is hovering around 9 if you feel like getting rich.
“Arizona, I said … is the second- or third-best team in the conference. I still hold true to that,” Doba said. “They are talented – I think more than the team we’re facing this week [ASU].”That's right, we're playing them this week. Bulletin board, anyone? In case you've been hiding in a deep hole, Arizona State is 5-0 and ranked 18th nationally. UA beat Washington State last week, and proud we are of all of them, but it was their first victory over a D1 opponent this season. This isn't just a pot shot at ASU either, Doba's insinuating that Arizona is better than Cal and/or Oregon as well.
Arizona is currently 1-3 against real teams, and don't give me that Appalachian State any given Saturday crap. With the exception of Cal the cats weren't playing the titans of the game either, posting losses to New Mexico in Tucson and at BYU.
Stupidity is punishible by many forms- pain, financial burden, or even a coaching stint in Jacksonville- but here's my suggestion for ASU to even the score, because being compared to Arizona football is an insult. I recommend the following final score on Saturday, photo style:
ASU
Wazzu
Take ASU, and the over. The spread is hovering around 9 if you feel like getting rich.
Labels: blog links, Dirk's a horse's ass, Pac-10 business, rivalry rants, surrounded by morons
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Beavers get Licked
Ahem. I couldn’t help but notice this little article from some website called house of heat or something of that ilk. To wit:
9/22, Oregon State: Nobody in Corvallis realizes how much they're going to miss departed QB Matt Moore. He was the heart and soul of the team that beat USC and I don't expect them to be in fighting shape by week four.At this time I’d like to toot my own horn and point out that I totally called this game... in July. Did they miss Moore? Fuckin’ A right they did, to the tune of FIVE interceptions and a few more almost-picks. Oregon State got away from their gameplan after the Devil D stopped RB Yvenson Bernard a few times and Canfield started churning out interceptions like free candy flowing from a van without windows.
After getting down 19-0 in the blink of an eye, there was absolutely no quit in the Sun Devils- not on offense, defense, or special teams. Kudos, I guess, to the new coaching staff for instilling a mental toughness in this team that was not there a year ago. Last year’s game at Oregon State didn’t start all that differently than this one did, but chins were up this time and the Sun Devils simply executed. How did they do it? In the words of Rudy Carpenter in an on-field post-game interview, “I don’t fuckin’ know.” Well said Rudy, and the mainstream folks will have to deal with a little pottymouth since you went 25-36 for 361 passing yards and four TDs.
Saturday’s game against Oregon State was a lesson for the Sun Devils. They are human and can get punched in the mouth by anyone, but just the same they can get back up and whip anyone up and down the field. Were the six OSU turnovers the difference? Absolutely, but that helped offset the 19 point 1st quarter donation to the Beavers. Stanford gave Oregon a serious scare before the Ducks pulled away, and they seem just as capable of upsetting an athletically superior ASU as they did two years ago on the Farm when Sam Keller tried to play through injuries, and poorly.
The to-do list for next week’s game at Stanford begins with being ready to go when the game starts.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, Pac-10 business, Shut up Carp, the new era
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Uh, hooray?
At least Troy Nolan is excited. Meh. For the second year in a row Arizona State stays undefeated in OOC play by defeating a hapless Colorado team in lackluster fashion. Rudy Carpenter threw a pick-6 in the opening series and the defensive secondary created a pile of those oh shit moments but were underexposed by a Colorado receiving corps that couldn't catch crabs from a 10-peso Tucson hooker.** Freshman QB Cody Hawkins looked stunning for a kid making his second career start, but perfect passes in stride were literally going through his WR's hands. The score could have easily been 28-0 before the ASU offense came to life in the second quarter.
Despite the secondary getting beaten several times, the front seven looked solid and they were especially stout against the run only allowing 37 yards on the ground. The newfound depth in the D-line rotation kept legs fresh, but the primary concern for this group is that they were unable to establish a lot of pressure on the quarterback when only rushing four. Many conference QBs would have picked apart the secondary with that much time in the pocket.
Everyone in Tempe has gone totally gay for Ryan Torain, even CU defender Alonzo Barrett. How is there a hands to the face penalty but nothing covering this? The Train racked up 91 yards on 17 carries, and while it pales in comparison to last week's numbers he recovered well from a slow start and a slight injury to propel the team through a medium-hot second and third quarter.
The line play of the Hell Hogs in front of Torain was up and down, and it appeared that they are beginning to take on the streaky nature of QB Rudy Carpenter: they play well when things are going good, but there's something lacking when things go south. Once things got going on offense, huge holes were opening up but the same can't be said for the first quarter. This could also be attributed to the thin Colorado D-lne and the 100-degree heat, but one thing is for sure- this position group needs the Koetter kicked out of them. A senior group like this one needs poise and confidence on every play.
One of the O-line's better moments as captured by 4VRADVL.comQB Rudy Carpenter sprayed passes on Saturday night and was only one pass over a 50% completion rate on the evening, but these weren't poorly executed dink and dunk passes. With the exception of one 6-yard screen pass to Torain, the shortest pass completion was for 16 yards, and that was a fourth and one toss to Nate Kimbrough. The receivers deserve a lot of the credit for catching balls thrown behind and above them on many ocasions. The night's biggest huzzah goes to Kyle Williams for his only catch, a 22-yard touchdown in the back of the end zone to end the first half. There were four to six defenders surrounding him and Carpenter put the ball in the one place that Williams and no one else could reach it. I was impressed with the placement and decision of the pass until I read Carp's post-game thoughts on the matter:
That was an unbelievable, unbelievable catch. It was late in the half so I figured whatever, if it is an interception they're not going to get much, I might as well take a chance for the end zone.Jeebus Cripes. WR Mike Jones had a pretty good view of the play from the field, here's what he had to say:
I saw four guys on Kyle [Williams] and I saw the ball go up in the air. I was like, `Oh my God.' Then I just saw the ball stick in Kyle's hands. I was like, `Wow, we scored.'
Scary, yet effective. (photo credit: DevilsDigest.com) I'll be crucified somewhere for saying this, but Carpenter's tuck and run ability looked Plummer-esque last night. Scrambling around trying to make a play was a big no-no under Koetter even though that's the trait that Dirk originally noticed in Rudy, but it suits his natural instincts and abilities well. He knows how to carry the ball when he takes off and I wasn't once concerned about a fumble.
Erickson's system also caters to Rudy's talents through the use of the shotgun, another Koetter no-no that was surprisingly used in Jacksonville today. While Carpenter was shaky and out of sorts in the first quarter, he looked like the brilliant 2005 Rudy during the no-huddle drive to end the first half, making quick reads and dissecting the Buff defense without out-thinking himself. Was the no-huddle applied in reaction to his slow start? Perhaps, and if it was then Coach Erickson deserves heaping praise for knowing his players and understanding how to manage them.
The man can read minds!
Coach Erickson wasn't the only Sun Devil coach in attendance as hoops head man Herb Sendek took in the game from the student section where he was handing out headbands to the sweaty undergrads. This was his second game in a row hanging with the kids, and last week he was seen meeting and greeting in the student wristband line where he sprayed the sun and beer soaked students with a water gun. When asked why he didn't bring it this week, he said that security wouldn't let him bring it inside the stadium. Good to see Herb cultivating a grassroots following for ASU basketball, which is how it will have to be done in the already crowded valley sports market.The chicken little sky is falling response has been that this team is no more disciplined than they were under Koetter after tracking up 136 penalty yards. Judging by Erickson's body language and halftime comments the players responsible for the careless penalties will be dealt with, like running wind sprints until they're blue in the face. DE knows what his legacy and reputation have become and I believe he wants to change that. Players that headed to the sideline after committing the infractions got an earful from Erickson and other coaches. I don't think this will be tolerated for very long, and remember that there were only four penalties against SJSU just a week ago.
I hate to sound so doom and gloom because it was a Sun Devil victory and a convincing one; it's a game that the coaches can point to and say "this is what happens when you take a team lightly, this is what NOT to do." Despite the inconsistencies in some areas the team is leaps and bounds better than the 2006 squad. The defense has given up one touchdown in eight quarters of play, Torain is averaging over 100 yards per game, the receivers are catching balls that would have been drops last year, and Carpenter's TD-INT ratio is 5-1. Will the schedule get tougher? Absolutely, but the team will also improve as time goes on. Of the weaknesses exposed against Colorado, all of them are correctable. It's still probably better that the east coast writers and coaches went to bed before watching the ASU game, because the final score was more impressive than the actual game.
**- on a side note, Florida State's DeCody Fagg might be the worst receiver in D-1 football. Next week's CU-FSU matchup in Denver should be a clinic in drops and fumbles.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, Greatest Fark Evah, hoops, Oh crap here we go again, Shut up Carp, the new era
Thursday, August 02, 2007
The mainstream gets some love
Hot diggity, today is the first day of practice! I don't know if this was a Koetter thing or what, but if you're planning on going to practice make sure to call ahead at (480) 965-5053 and get approval to attend. The boys are at Kajikawa Practice Facility (Rural and 6th, Tempe) this week before heading to Camp T next Wednesday.
Even though the mainstream media gets a lot of flack here in the blogosphere, the Valley outlets have been on the ball and done some impressive stuff. In addition to everything mentioned yesterday, Dan Zeiger of the East Valley Tribune does a preview of fall camp and addresses the top 10 questions facing the Sun Devil program. I was actually very taken by this quip of original thought from the first question, addressing the transition from Koetter to Erickson:
Over at the big paper, Jeff Metcalfe does an excellent job (as usual) of previewing some of the newer faces that will be big-time contributors this year including both newcomers and guys who have worked their way up the depth chart. He also pens a short piece on the coaching change and notes that Omar Bolden, the potential savior of the #2 corner position, will be allowed to practice. Per the same article I'm also stunned to find that the nephew of the O.G. Rudy is an ASU baseball recruit.
Even though the mainstream media gets a lot of flack here in the blogosphere, the Valley outlets have been on the ball and done some impressive stuff. In addition to everything mentioned yesterday, Dan Zeiger of the East Valley Tribune does a preview of fall camp and addresses the top 10 questions facing the Sun Devil program. I was actually very taken by this quip of original thought from the first question, addressing the transition from Koetter to Erickson:
Something to watch — though, if it emerges, it will likely not be during the preseason — is how the Sun Devils respond to their coach’s let-players-be-players philosophy. Although Erickson preaches accountability, could ASU choke on the freedoms he gives?It lends itself to the preconceived notions that Erickson runs a thug program and that trouble brews out of his jetwash after he leaves a particular program, but the point is very valid. I could make the argument that one of the reasons my Fall '98 g.p.a. was a robust 0.67 was that I had too much free time to swill Killian's at the Vine and (theoretically) do bong hits on the roof of my house until 5 am. Just sayin'.
Over at the big paper, Jeff Metcalfe does an excellent job (as usual) of previewing some of the newer faces that will be big-time contributors this year including both newcomers and guys who have worked their way up the depth chart. He also pens a short piece on the coaching change and notes that Omar Bolden, the potential savior of the #2 corner position, will be allowed to practice. Per the same article I'm also stunned to find that the nephew of the O.G. Rudy is an ASU baseball recruit.
Coming soon to Packard Stadium: whiny pipsqueak.
I don't know if it's the coaching change bringing new life to the program or that everybody really hated Koetter for being a jerk to the media, but even the local radio shows are getting on the Sun Devil bandwagon more than usual. KTAR has archived interviews with both Rudy Carpenter and Coach Erickson, and XTRA 910 has an additional hour-long interview with Carp (it's in 4 different parts). For the record I think XTRA's Bickley and Jurecki are twits and KTAR's Doug and Wolf are even worse, but it's nice to hear directly from the guys that are putting the work in to make things better on Saturdays this fall.
Coach E (can we start calling him Eazy-E?) is charismatic and easy to like, but I feel like I'm being set up for a letdown- the more I admire him, the more I know he's going to break my heart even worse, like retiring and leaving us on double-secret probation. Oh well, a smarter feller than myself once said, "tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all." Just get ASU to the BCS, that's all I ask. You can get more of Eazy's charm and wit by watching the video of Pac-10 Media day. After the link, click on "archived video"underneath Sparky and the site may require a brief and free registration.
Rudy comes off... like Koetter I guess- not to be insulting, but he's very cerebral and calculated. He sounds like he's coming to grips with who he is and who he needs to be as the leader of this team. He has a fragile psyche reliant upon confidence, which it sounds like he has regained after working with Eazy-E all spring and summer and attending the Manning Passing Academy as an instructor, where NFL scouts told him he has one of the most accurate balls in college today. He said he also really valued being able to pick Peyton Manning's brain at every available opportunity. That confidence will have time to solidify thanks to the home-heavy and soft early season schedule. What will be important is how he rebounds after a bad game or a loss. The playbook will be easier for players to grasp (I'm looking at you, wide receivers) since there's only one for the entire season- apparently Koetter used a different one for each week depending on the opponent.
Erickson's offense allows Carpenter to be more instinctive and quick-thinking as a quarterback rather than over-scheming and removing that intuitiveness that makes good quarterbacks great. Carp's also extremely happy that Offensive Coordinator Rich Olson isn't trying to change his throwing mechanics. He says he wants to “go back to how I was, how Jake [Plummer]was- just playing football.”
The interviews aren't all nuts and bolts. Rudy joked that he and the receivers have been working on end zone celebrations and that new kicker Thomas Weber needs to get ready to kick 35-yard extra points. On the upcoming season, he's looking forward to redeeming himself after last year's piss-poor performance against Cal and the Thanksgiving game against USC is circled on everyone's calendar, although they are all aware of the importance of the in-state rivalry.
“The biggest game for me every year is always UofA” Carpenter added, but after speaking of the emergence of the running game as a strength, he made the quote of the week: “I might not have a lot of TD passes this year but I’ll probably have about 5 or 6 against UofA.” Yippee!
See, the mainstream isn't so bad. I'm a total linkwhore for Everyday Should Be Saturday, but their site is down right now since they have server issues. Do you think espn ever has that problem? I think not. Eh, fuck that shit. On a final note, I have a new must-read-daily fanboy crush on another blog, Kissing Suzy Kolber. It takes "crude" to an artistic level and it's good enough that it actually makes me care about the NFL and fantasy football. Their pop-culture references make me look like a boorish 50-something golf-playing husband and they host a weekly reader's mock draft that's fucking spectacular. Pothead Simpsons fans really make the best journalists, after all.
Labels: anecdotal evidence, blog links, Dirk's a horse's ass, Greatest Fark Evah, hatred for the 4-letter network, I miss college, QnA, Shut up Carp, the new era
Thursday, July 26, 2007
An open roundtable from Trev
Through a lot of linking I found a roundtable discussion brought forth by Trev Alberts of FireMarkMay.com that, while a month old, could use my attention. I'm not yet a blogpoll member but I aspire to be, so here goes...
Your Home Field Advantage
Give the more zealous portion of your fanbase a religion. What's this cult following? Feel free to give the splitters a derogatory nickname.
We all bow to Frank Kush, the patron saint of Sun Devil football who was professionally crucified by those whom he had come to enlighten- a camp catalyzed by a false idol, none other than a flag-waving kicker. (as everyone knows, kickers are NOT football players) The congregation became disillusioned and dissolved in the following years by carpetbaggers such as Rodgers and Cooper, then demoralized by Marmie the incompetent. Savior Jake Plummer had come to restore joy to the desert, but by that time the barbarians of professional sport had fully infiltrated the holy land and many followers had converted to the dark side. Our sect became divided in recent years, falling into the camps of lovers and haters and split by one man's papacy, Dirk Koetter. Koetter was forced out after piss-poor performance and record-setting bad decisions, which allowed for the new savior to enter our church, one Dennis Erickson. In a throwback to the old testament of Kush, Erickson preaches ideas once thought to be antiquated, like a running game and a physical defense. Lovers and haters are reunited and hope is restored in Sun Devil Land as we wander through the desert, although not-so-aimlessly anymore.
With an unlimited AD budget, add or subtract one thing to your school's gameday experience that has nothing to do with football.
Lot 59 is replaced with sod, shade trees, and plumbing facilities because quite frankly we are light years behind the Southeastern schools when it comes to tailgating, mostly because spending all day on shadeless blacktop in 110+ degree heat is no one's good time. For extra income the former parking lot is a nine-hole, par-three golf course during the week and a 10-story parking megastructure is erected for regular student parking where the bullshit Alpha Drive fraternity houses once sat.(hollaback old school Adelphi row!) We can put it right next to the football team's brand spankin' new indoor practice facility.
Just imagine a grove of oaks 160 yards that way.
General NCAA questions
Coin a hilariously unrealistic stereotype that you would like to "make stick" for this upcoming season.
The Stoops regime is fired from Tucson and they moochingly move back into brother Bob's McMansion basement in Norman, all while trying to raise a young daughter/sissyboy. Think My Two Dads but with three guys, two of whom are gay. And a lot of strained-faced yelling.
Redesign your conference or independent schedule with reckless abandon. Be prepared to include compensation for jilted schools and conferences in your explanation.
Jeez this thing is getting long. The Pac-10 finally got it right with the full round-robin schedule, no need for me to go fucking with it. As for the OOC slate, I'd like to see the Sun Devils take on more teams in the northeast and upper midwest. ASU is so popular with non-athlete students that it offers virtual orientation in Philly, Chicago, and Seattle, and this desire to escape the miserable fucking cold of those God-forsaken places ought to be exploited for recruiting purposes. Imagine getting on a plane in lake effect snow-ridden Buffalo in February and landing in Tempe where it's 75 and sunny for an official visit, and now envision a behemoth 18 year-old signing on the dotted line.
Following up on your new realignment, blow up the BCS and devise a national playoff system, money grabs and missed exams be damned. Using your new fantasy conferences is optional.
The existing bowl games get used on a rotating basis as neutral sites for a 16-team playoff, and the ones that aren't selected for the bracket games can be held as exhibitions, like a football NIT. More traditional bowls like the Rose and Fiesta are used for the latter rounds and they rotate much like the BCS does now. I'd like to suggest that the current conferences be blown up and reorganized into equally sized divisions (while eliminting those bullshit conference championship games) for the purpose of selecting some of the participants in this proposed playoff, but that's just crazy talk.
Elect one public figure to replace NCAA president Myles Brand. Anyone with proper name recognition is eligible.
Charles Fucking Barkley, and I don't think I need to explain myself. Even though he's a basketball player, being from Alabama he should intuitively understand the importance of college football.
Be sure to check out others' responses in the comments section of FireMarkMay's original post.
Your Home Field Advantage
Give the more zealous portion of your fanbase a religion. What's this cult following? Feel free to give the splitters a derogatory nickname.
We all bow to Frank Kush, the patron saint of Sun Devil football who was professionally crucified by those whom he had come to enlighten- a camp catalyzed by a false idol, none other than a flag-waving kicker. (as everyone knows, kickers are NOT football players) The congregation became disillusioned and dissolved in the following years by carpetbaggers such as Rodgers and Cooper, then demoralized by Marmie the incompetent. Savior Jake Plummer had come to restore joy to the desert, but by that time the barbarians of professional sport had fully infiltrated the holy land and many followers had converted to the dark side. Our sect became divided in recent years, falling into the camps of lovers and haters and split by one man's papacy, Dirk Koetter. Koetter was forced out after piss-poor performance and record-setting bad decisions, which allowed for the new savior to enter our church, one Dennis Erickson. In a throwback to the old testament of Kush, Erickson preaches ideas once thought to be antiquated, like a running game and a physical defense. Lovers and haters are reunited and hope is restored in Sun Devil Land as we wander through the desert, although not-so-aimlessly anymore.
If this piece doesn't get me into hell for violation of the 1st Commandment, nothing will.
Your biggest rival is in town, and College Gameday is coming....to your citaaaaaaay... Create a blatant corporate sellout promotion to appeal to the mass unwashed.
In the spirit of espn being onsite, Pat Tillman's death will be exploited to the grandest extent. Gold-colored Army Ranger berets will be administered to the first 50,000 attendees, the marching band does a patriotic 4th of July-style set at halftime, and there is a missing man flyover to accompany the fireworks after each Sun Devil score.
Add one local delicacy to your stadium's concessions. Post-tax pricing is optional.
Other than alcohol? For four bucks apiece, Filiberto's (or whatever it's called now) offers burritos made to order. The tortilla throwing tradition takes on a whole new level when players and cheerleaders start slipping on fresh-made guacamole, but Michael Crow puts the kibash on the whole thing after a male cheerleader dies when a chorizo and egg burrito funnels through a megaphone and asphyxiates him. 
Jan had spirit, yes he did...
With an unlimited AD budget, add or subtract one thing to your school's gameday experience that has nothing to do with football.
Lot 59 is replaced with sod, shade trees, and plumbing facilities because quite frankly we are light years behind the Southeastern schools when it comes to tailgating, mostly because spending all day on shadeless blacktop in 110+ degree heat is no one's good time. For extra income the former parking lot is a nine-hole, par-three golf course during the week and a 10-story parking megastructure is erected for regular student parking where the bullshit Alpha Drive fraternity houses once sat.(hollaback old school Adelphi row!) We can put it right next to the football team's brand spankin' new indoor practice facility.
Just imagine a grove of oaks 160 yards that way.General NCAA questions
Coin a hilariously unrealistic stereotype that you would like to "make stick" for this upcoming season.
The Stoops regime is fired from Tucson and they moochingly move back into brother Bob's McMansion basement in Norman, all while trying to raise a young daughter/sissyboy. Think My Two Dads but with three guys, two of whom are gay. And a lot of strained-faced yelling.
Redesign your conference or independent schedule with reckless abandon. Be prepared to include compensation for jilted schools and conferences in your explanation.
Jeez this thing is getting long. The Pac-10 finally got it right with the full round-robin schedule, no need for me to go fucking with it. As for the OOC slate, I'd like to see the Sun Devils take on more teams in the northeast and upper midwest. ASU is so popular with non-athlete students that it offers virtual orientation in Philly, Chicago, and Seattle, and this desire to escape the miserable fucking cold of those God-forsaken places ought to be exploited for recruiting purposes. Imagine getting on a plane in lake effect snow-ridden Buffalo in February and landing in Tempe where it's 75 and sunny for an official visit, and now envision a behemoth 18 year-old signing on the dotted line.
Following up on your new realignment, blow up the BCS and devise a national playoff system, money grabs and missed exams be damned. Using your new fantasy conferences is optional.
The existing bowl games get used on a rotating basis as neutral sites for a 16-team playoff, and the ones that aren't selected for the bracket games can be held as exhibitions, like a football NIT. More traditional bowls like the Rose and Fiesta are used for the latter rounds and they rotate much like the BCS does now. I'd like to suggest that the current conferences be blown up and reorganized into equally sized divisions (while eliminting those bullshit conference championship games) for the purpose of selecting some of the participants in this proposed playoff, but that's just crazy talk.
Elect one public figure to replace NCAA president Myles Brand. Anyone with proper name recognition is eligible.
Charles Fucking Barkley, and I don't think I need to explain myself. Even though he's a basketball player, being from Alabama he should intuitively understand the importance of college football.
Be sure to check out others' responses in the comments section of FireMarkMay's original post.
Labels: anecdotal evidence, blog links, Dirk's a horse's ass, dirty icky recruiting, Greatest Fark Evah, movie references, Pac-10 business, QnA, tailgating, UA morons
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Premature Premonitions, Part III: The Schedule
You think you can do better? be my guest. At the end of the year I'll be sure to point out every one I get right and ignore every one I get wrong.
9/1, San Jose State: Former UA coach Dick Tomey has a knack for beating ASU and this will be closer than most think. Expect a tough defense, volumes of trick plays, and for this game to still be in doubt at halftime. SJSU was a bowl team last year, and after scaring the piss out of me the Devils will pull away in the second half. ASU by 17
9/8, Colorado: The Buffs went on the road last year and almost pulled off an upset at Georgia, but I think they're still playing intramurals, brother. Too much offense on our side of the ball and the crowd should be good. ASU by 21
9/15, San Diego State: SDSU returns 4 defensive starters from a 3-9 team. While that may help, it won't help enough against Ryan Torain and a senior-laden O-line. The defense should be starting to gel by now. ASU by 24
9/22, Oregon State: Nobody in Corvallis realizes how much they're going to miss departed QB Matt Moore. He was the heart and soul of the team that beat USC and I don't expect them to be in fighting shape by week four. ASU by 14
9/29, at Stanford: I can't believe the Devils haven't won a Pac-10 roadie in Cali since 1999. Coach Erickson has the team playing with confidence and Dirk Koetter is a distant memory. ASU by 30+
10/6, at Washington State: The first serious road trip will be close- it's WSU’s homecoming and QB Brink's a gamer. They have some quality receivers but their run game is a bit suspect. ASU by 7
10/13, Washington: Trap game! ASU returns home at a 6-0 mark and there's a buzz building around town causing the best crowd of the year. UW will be anywhere from 2-3 to 0-5 and hungry for a win. If Dirk's still coaching this is a loss. ASU by 13
10/27, Cal: The Devils will be fresh off of a bye week and seeking redemption after last year's embarassment in Berkeley, but ASU's secondary + DeSean Jackson = bad news, even on Homecoming. Cal by 4
11/3, at Oregon: I'm not sold on QB Dennis Dixon despite last year's statstical beat down in Tempe (lots of screen passes that went long) and Coach Belotti will probably be shuffling Leaf the younger in by this point in the season. ASU by 9
11/10, at UCLA: 20 returning starters for the Bruins, holy freaking God. Their strength last year was the run D and that won't change. Expect Torain to have his worst day of the year. UCLA by 12
11/22, USC: Arizona State has a hard time getting a good crowd on Thanksgiving Day and it's freakin' USC. The young Trojan talent is firing on all cylinders by now and the tryptophan leaves the Devils flat. USC by 27
12/1, Arizona: The premier matchup will be UA's defense against ASU's offense, but the game will be decided by Air-izona vs. the Devil D. If concussion prone Willie Tuitama still has his head on his shoulders by week 12, the kittycat offense will be decent but not good enough. ASU will be trying to save face after two consecutive losses and Erickson won't let them come out flat. ASU by 10
Once again we’re the best of the rest of the Pac-10 at 9-3. We still don’t have the horses to run with the big boys but we’re not beating ourselves against the other dwarves. With this schedule we should be better but it’ll take a minor miracle to run through the final five games with two or fewer losses. The only chance is that the players adapt and buy into Erickson’s schemes quickly and all of the outstanding questions are answered with good fortune.
Bowl game, Nebraska: Sam Keller throws for 600+ yards and 6 TD's in a Husker rout. He then goes into the stands and fucks half of ASU's women, yet mysteriously all women present become pregnant and give birth to coked-up, rocket-armed cyborgs that destroy the earth. Far fetched, yes, but it's as close to anyone's bowl prediction made before fall camp.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, drugs, Pac-10 business, the new era, UA morons, we're sorry Sam Keller
Monday, July 23, 2007
Premature Premonitions, Part II: Defense & Special Teams
Remember that it’s still July so there are a ton of unanswered questions and the defensive side of the ball isn’t as shored up as the offense so there’s a lot of guesswork present. You can look at Coach Erickson’s two-deep on page two of the massive PDF right here but few jobs seem secure going into fall practice.
DL- Kyle Caldwell and Jordan Hill were three-year starters and while neither were Terrell Suggs-level superstars their presence will severely be missed. Hill moved to DT from linebacker and was undersized until his senior year, while a myriad of injuries kept Caldwell from reaching his true potential. The remaining starters look good and they’re surrounded by a lot of raw talent. BYU transfer Mike Marquandt was a lane-clogging beast from day one and Dexter Davis, last year’s supposed question mark as a redshirt freshman, became a bigger weapon at rush end than Caldwell by season’s finish. Marquandt will be helped at tackle by Florida transfer Tranell Morant, who transferred two years ago but made little impact at defensive end last year. Erickson has moved him inside but I wonder if he has the bulk to compete in the middle. Backups include seemingly eighth-year senior David Smith along with redshirt freshmen Jon Hargis, Zach Niusulu, and offensive line convert Saia Falahola. Highly touted JuCo transfer Luis Vasquez is penciled in as the other starter at DE, and his supporting cast features veterans Wes Evans and Kellen Mills who have seen little game time during their Sun Devil careers. Expect JuCo transfers Alex Asi and Eric Tanner to be featured prominently in the defensive end rotation.
LB- There is a glut of young talent at linebacker with an emphasis on young. Four of the top six LB’s return from last year but few have more than one year of experience in Maroon and Gold. Local boy Gerald Munns, Pat Tillman look-alike Travis Goethel, and former LA Dodger Mike Nixon stepped in as true freshmen and saw a lot of the field playing beyond the expectations of most. Ryan McFoy saw playing time as a nickel back last year as a true frosh and he will be thrust into the mix at LB along with JuCo transfer Morris Wooten, who some consider talented enough to be a starter right away. The three starting spots are up for grabs among Goethel, Nixon, Wooten, Munns, McFoy, and senior Robert James who is returning after recovering from chronic headaches. Backups that should be in the rotation will be Chad Lindsey, Garrett Judah, and redshirt freshmen Jamarr Robinson and Jeff Bereuter.
CB- Ah, the fun begins. Shockingly enough Keno Walter-White will be missed because nobody seems capable of starting at the number two corner sport. The good news is that Justin Tryon is as close to a lock-down corner as anyone at ASU in the last few years, even though the folks at Cal don’t care for him too much. Chad Green’s unfortunate car accident affects the depth chart but he was one of several that simply shouldn’t make the cut as a starter. Chris Baloney was the hero against NAU in last year’s opener, getting a pick-6 that sealed the win. Nagging injuries throughout the 2006 season kept his productivity down but he appears to be the best of the rest. Help could be on the way in the form of true frosh Omar Bolden, a highly touted recruit that has yet to be academically approved by the NCAA clearinghouse. Many believe that he possesses the physical tools to play corner in the Pac-10 right away, but the phrase ”counting the chickens before they’ve hatched” comes to mind. Travis Smith, Litrele Jones, Grant Crunkleton, and JuCo transfer Jarrell Holman will also be in the mix as back-ups.
Safety- Josh Barrett is racking up tons of preseason accolades and will be the anchor in the secondary. The departure of Zach Catanese leaves the other spot wide open but this looks like the best defensive unit on the team. I thought that Ryan McFoy’s solid play last year would be enough to garner the starting free safety spot but one of Dennis Erickson’s first actions this spring was moving him to linebacker. He did so because of the emergence of Troy Nolan, the defensive MVP of spring camp who will be in close competition for the starting spot with Jeremy Payton. Returnees Rodney Cox and Angelo Fobbs-Valentino will provide back up support while true freshmen Colin Parker and Oliver Aaron may see the field in case of injury.
The defensive unit as a whole is a giant question mark. Teams with multiple high-quality receivers (Cal, USC) will give the corners fits but the biggest question is at defensive line with all of the unproven players. The ability to pressure the opposing quarterback while rushing only four was the key to defensive success last year and problems typically occurred when the corners and safeties cheated in to help with the run leaving the DB’s in single coverage. As crazy and forward-thinking as it sounds, the ability to control the line of scrimmage will be paramount in the success of the Devil D. The early season schedule is soft enough that the team should be working together and picking up schemes by the time conference play begins. A longstanding issue in Tempe has been that the caliber of defensive players under Dirk Koetter was not up to the level of their conference foes. Better players were being recruited in the last two years and there was marked improvement from 2005 to 2006, but the personnel issue still remains: does ASU have the horses to run with USC, et. al?
ST- Four-year starter Jesse Ainsworth departs and while he didn’t win any awards he was, in a word, consistent. Kickoffs were always deep in the endzone and he was almost automatic on field goals inside of 40 yards. Thomas Weber arrives unproven and will have to adjust to big crowds quickly. Jonathan Johnson was solid at punter with zero blocked and big hang times, however he wasn’t immune to the occasional shank and outkicked his coverage a few times; hopefully an extra year will provide more consistency. Ultra-reliable long snapper Jason Burke will have to be replaced as well. Terry Richardson (left, saving Koetter's job in the 2005 Duel) departs as one of the best kick/punt returners in recent memory and his position is up for grabs among Kyle Williams, Rudy Burgess, and Chris McGaha. Coverage will be a wild card as Koetter usually used the top athletes on special teams and it is currently unknown how Erickson is going to fill those spots. Keegan Herring and Justin Tryon were excellent gunners on punts last season but no one really knows how kickoff coverage will be since Ainsworth allowed so few returns. Many people are happy to see Tom Osborne go but the punting unit was the only one of the four that had significant troubles during his tenure as special teams coach.
DL- Kyle Caldwell and Jordan Hill were three-year starters and while neither were Terrell Suggs-level superstars their presence will severely be missed. Hill moved to DT from linebacker and was undersized until his senior year, while a myriad of injuries kept Caldwell from reaching his true potential. The remaining starters look good and they’re surrounded by a lot of raw talent. BYU transfer Mike Marquandt was a lane-clogging beast from day one and Dexter Davis, last year’s supposed question mark as a redshirt freshman, became a bigger weapon at rush end than Caldwell by season’s finish. Marquandt will be helped at tackle by Florida transfer Tranell Morant, who transferred two years ago but made little impact at defensive end last year. Erickson has moved him inside but I wonder if he has the bulk to compete in the middle. Backups include seemingly eighth-year senior David Smith along with redshirt freshmen Jon Hargis, Zach Niusulu, and offensive line convert Saia Falahola. Highly touted JuCo transfer Luis Vasquez is penciled in as the other starter at DE, and his supporting cast features veterans Wes Evans and Kellen Mills who have seen little game time during their Sun Devil careers. Expect JuCo transfers Alex Asi and Eric Tanner to be featured prominently in the defensive end rotation.LB- There is a glut of young talent at linebacker with an emphasis on young. Four of the top six LB’s return from last year but few have more than one year of experience in Maroon and Gold. Local boy Gerald Munns, Pat Tillman look-alike Travis Goethel, and former LA Dodger Mike Nixon stepped in as true freshmen and saw a lot of the field playing beyond the expectations of most. Ryan McFoy saw playing time as a nickel back last year as a true frosh and he will be thrust into the mix at LB along with JuCo transfer Morris Wooten, who some consider talented enough to be a starter right away. The three starting spots are up for grabs among Goethel, Nixon, Wooten, Munns, McFoy, and senior Robert James who is returning after recovering from chronic headaches. Backups that should be in the rotation will be Chad Lindsey, Garrett Judah, and redshirt freshmen Jamarr Robinson and Jeff Bereuter.CB- Ah, the fun begins. Shockingly enough Keno Walter-White will be missed because nobody seems capable of starting at the number two corner sport. The good news is that Justin Tryon is as close to a lock-down corner as anyone at ASU in the last few years, even though the folks at Cal don’t care for him too much. Chad Green’s unfortunate car accident affects the depth chart but he was one of several that simply shouldn’t make the cut as a starter. Chris Baloney was the hero against NAU in last year’s opener, getting a pick-6 that sealed the win. Nagging injuries throughout the 2006 season kept his productivity down but he appears to be the best of the rest. Help could be on the way in the form of true frosh Omar Bolden, a highly touted recruit that has yet to be academically approved by the NCAA clearinghouse. Many believe that he possesses the physical tools to play corner in the Pac-10 right away, but the phrase ”counting the chickens before they’ve hatched” comes to mind. Travis Smith, Litrele Jones, Grant Crunkleton, and JuCo transfer Jarrell Holman will also be in the mix as back-ups.
Safety- Josh Barrett is racking up tons of preseason accolades and will be the anchor in the secondary. The departure of Zach Catanese leaves the other spot wide open but this looks like the best defensive unit on the team. I thought that Ryan McFoy’s solid play last year would be enough to garner the starting free safety spot but one of Dennis Erickson’s first actions this spring was moving him to linebacker. He did so because of the emergence of Troy Nolan, the defensive MVP of spring camp who will be in close competition for the starting spot with Jeremy Payton. Returnees Rodney Cox and Angelo Fobbs-Valentino will provide back up support while true freshmen Colin Parker and Oliver Aaron may see the field in case of injury.
The defensive unit as a whole is a giant question mark. Teams with multiple high-quality receivers (Cal, USC) will give the corners fits but the biggest question is at defensive line with all of the unproven players. The ability to pressure the opposing quarterback while rushing only four was the key to defensive success last year and problems typically occurred when the corners and safeties cheated in to help with the run leaving the DB’s in single coverage. As crazy and forward-thinking as it sounds, the ability to control the line of scrimmage will be paramount in the success of the Devil D. The early season schedule is soft enough that the team should be working together and picking up schemes by the time conference play begins. A longstanding issue in Tempe has been that the caliber of defensive players under Dirk Koetter was not up to the level of their conference foes. Better players were being recruited in the last two years and there was marked improvement from 2005 to 2006, but the personnel issue still remains: does ASU have the horses to run with USC, et. al?
ST- Four-year starter Jesse Ainsworth departs and while he didn’t win any awards he was, in a word, consistent. Kickoffs were always deep in the endzone and he was almost automatic on field goals inside of 40 yards. Thomas Weber arrives unproven and will have to adjust to big crowds quickly. Jonathan Johnson was solid at punter with zero blocked and big hang times, however he wasn’t immune to the occasional shank and outkicked his coverage a few times; hopefully an extra year will provide more consistency. Ultra-reliable long snapper Jason Burke will have to be replaced as well. Terry Richardson (left, saving Koetter's job in the 2005 Duel) departs as one of the best kick/punt returners in recent memory and his position is up for grabs among Kyle Williams, Rudy Burgess, and Chris McGaha. Coverage will be a wild card as Koetter usually used the top athletes on special teams and it is currently unknown how Erickson is going to fill those spots. Keegan Herring and Justin Tryon were excellent gunners on punts last season but no one really knows how kickoff coverage will be since Ainsworth allowed so few returns. Many people are happy to see Tom Osborne go but the punting unit was the only one of the four that had significant troubles during his tenure as special teams coach. I'll take a look at the schedule and make a few predictions in Part III, which will be up within a couple of days.
Labels: ASU alumni, Dirk's a horse's ass, dirty icky recruiting, the new era
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Spring football news will have to wait
First he steals content, now he's attacking blog sites for no apparent reason. While this is probably exactly what he wants to happen, the news must be spread: Colin Cowherd is a douchebag.
As reported by EDSBS, the aforementioned enema-facilitator today launched a nuclear attack on thebiglead.com, directing listeners to the site- not for witty, original content mind you- but solely for the purpose of crashing their server, knowing full well that most bloggers have extremely low bandwidth due to it's free nature.
Deadspin is also all over this like Mike Stoops on a pitcher of rage-ahol, and they have even gone so far as to challenge Sir Douchie to pull such a stunt on their anti-espn banner waving site with the following statement:
Oh, and go ahead and try that shit with us. We dare you.
Huzzah! This isn't the first time the blogosphere has had to unite against CC, either. Just 53 weeks ago the M Zone was mocking the NFL Draft Combine's Wonderlic test by coming up with some questions for the modern athlete (re: spoiled thug). It's brilliant stuff, really, which can be found here but you probably already heard it on Cowherd's espn radio show since he read eight of Benny & Yost's fake questions on-air without any mention of the actual authors. After responding professionally with several letters to the show, Cowherd sent the following response via email:
WE WERE SENT IT....WE HAD NO IDEA..BUT THE INCESSANT WHINING...MEANS I WON'T GIVE YOU CREDIT NOW..GET OVER IT.
CC
Ass. The M Zone can tell the story much better than I can, so you can read their version of what happened, followed by their one-year anniversary recap. Deadspin has their version of the encounter as well, which is just as juicy and more attacking than defensive. (as it probably ought to be)
Dirk's gone now, so someone has to fill in as the horse's ass.***
It should be noted that Cowherd gave proper credit to the original authors five days later, but a rift has been growing between traditional media members and we underwear-laden, couch-potato amateurs for some time now. Some folks like their sports news straight up and to the point. Some like it overproduced with dorks in suits yelling things like booya! throughout the stories about Notre Dame, USC, and the NBA. The rest of us like our news full of sarcasm, bias, and four letter words. Fuck. Yeah, I said it. We patronize blogs because we can't stand the mainstream media any longer. Mass-media outlet schtick has grown tiresome so we have gone elsewhere, and the big boys resent it. We want coverage of topics in which we are interested; we don't think it's important just because they do, like the Yankees/Red Sox rivalry.
Support your local blog. Ignore Cowherd and all things espn, or else you support terrorism. Ok, that's not entirely true. But mostly true. The only way things will ever really change is if we become more selective as an audience. Watch the games, sure, but ignore their coverage of them. We bloggers are better than they are anyway. Shit.
EDIT: I'd also like to point out that I'm totally not worried about Cowherd attacking this site for it's opinion since 1) only four people read it and 2) Blogger fucks up all the time anyway, so how would it be any sifferent.
***- this very website is the 7th result listed upon a google image search of "horse's ass." I am slowly starting to rock.
Labels: blog links, Dirk's a horse's ass, hatred for the 4-letter network, surrounded by morons
Friday, February 02, 2007
FIRE SALE!
I'd totally take Koetter to the hole, especially in his own back yard. Former ASU head coach Dirk Koetter has his former home listed on the market at a whopping $1.595 mil. I'll not get into how Valley real estate has swollen to retarded levels, but this McMansion with small-fry back yard depicts exactly what has been wrong with ASU football. Over-priced, too small, drab, uninspiring, and a severe lack of swank. Today's recruits need greased-up stripper poles, fully stocked wet bars, and a pool/hot tub- NAY! pool and hot tub, each in the shape of Courtney Simpson. JoePa is still getting the PA catholic kids to sign using the ping pong table in the garage, but this is Sun Devil country. This is how we roll. The Erickson era has begun, and it's time for the next level. Coach E's wine cellar (and you know he has one) is twice the size of this dump. Somewhere, Pete Carroll is laughing.
Pete Carroll could not be reached at his Malibu home (pictured above) for comment. We couldn't find him, even if we could get past the guards. The great architect and urban planner Daniel Burnham once wrote:
"Make no little plans; they have no magic to stir men's blood and probablyHe's talking about his famed White City and other monstrous designs like Washington DC's Union Station, but can't we apply this to a football program, specifically the one at ASU? Go after the big name recruits. Schedule and upset power programs. Win a game in California for a change. Win a conference championship. Win a national championship. Doing these things will stir the blood of the fans and will not be forgotten anytime soon, but you have to be able to dream them first. Watch and learn, Dirk.
themselves will not be realized. Make big plans; aim high in hope and work,
remembering that a noble, logical diagram once recorded will not die, but long
after we are gone be a living thing, asserting itself with ever-growing
insistence."
Labels: ASU alumni, Dirk's a horse's ass, I'm witty, the new era
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Fuck Hawaii, Fuck Colt Brennan, and Fuck Don Ho.
Mele Kalikmyballs.While the Sun Devils played inspired football for most of Sunday night's game against the Hawaii Warriors, Dirk Koetter proved to be too much for the players to overcome as piss-poor halftime adjustments and weak efforts on the field plagued ASU late in the fourth quarter. June Jones and the Hawaii coaching staff must have reminded Colt Brennan that he was passing against the Arizona State secondary, sans an injured Zach Catanese no less, and the junior record-setting QB followed in the steps of Dennis Dixon, Nate Longshore, and too many others by scorching them to the tune of 559 passing yards and 5 touchdowns in Hawaii's 41-24 victory.
5 Good things About Sunday Night's Loss:
1.) Rudy Carpenter played his best game since the 2005 Insight Bowl. You won't see it on the statline, but the lost mojo/swagger of which everyone spoke following the midseason slump was finally back for the Hawaii Bowl, even if it was too little, too late.
2.) Mike Jones! The guys in the booth kept making references to the rapper of the same name, and Jones earned it. He had, by far, his best game as a Sun Devil and looks to lead the receiving corps into the Dennis Erickson era with some promise. This was the player everyone saw in the spring game, and it's about damn time it translated into a real game. He had 5 catches for 72 yards, but many were in clutch situations.
3.) Ryan Torain will be in the backfield for the 2007 Sun Devils. Dude's phenomenal and should be one of the top backs in the Pac next year. He had 160 yards on 18 carries, including a career-long 62-yarder.
4.) There are no 300 pound tailbacks in the Pac-10. Thank God.
5.) Dirk Koetter is gone. Shots anyone?! No more emotionless players. No more folding under pressure. No more punting away any hope of winning games. Throughout most of the game I thought ASU played well and did Dirk proud, but as soon as he quit on them they quit on him. This is twice now that Koetter has pulled this punt crap, and since it is the last time (yeeha!) he gets the horse's ass again.
Even a horse's ass knows when not to punt. At least it didn't get blocked. Additional kudos for solid play go to Josh Barrett, Travis Goethel, Brandon Smith, and the outgoing seniors.
5 Not So Good Things About Sunday Night's loss:
1.) Tackling, or lack thereof. Jesus. Fucking. Christ. Get in front of a guy, wrap his legs, and drive up. It's just that simple. If you think he's going to juke, watch his midsection. It's a tell-tale sign of which way he's going. I learned this in pop warner, it's really not that complicated. ASU's D probably holds Brennan to less than 400 yards passing if the secondary could have dropped guys upon initial contact. I'm not talking about those bruising running backs, either- they are freaks of nature and have to be treated accordingly. Hawaii's wide receivers needed to be brought down, or knocked out of bounds, waaaay earlier than they were.
2.) Keno Walter-White. Sorry buddy, you're back in the shithouse again. I really appreciate the photo op on 11/25 and you seem like a really nice guy, but you were everybody's bitch on Sunday. You were much like a port-o-potty: you got used, and often times shit on, everywhere you went. One of Hawaii's receivers had 308 receiving yards, and even though I haven't reviewed the game film I'd be willing to bet that he was your man to cover most of the time.
3.) Justin Tryon letting the guy go. After Dirk punted the game away it really didn't make much difference, but you can't get called out on national tv by a neutral observer for a lack of effort. Coach Erickson was probably watching (from a bar?) the telecast and you are in his doghouse before having never met the man. You have been the team's top corner all year, but you will now have to rebuild your reputation with many. I't a long offseason with nothing else to do, so you can expect this incident to be abuzz all year.
4.) Terry Richardson and Jamaal Lewis didn't make the trip to Hawaii. There wasn't a big deal made about it, leading me to believe that it was for disciplinary reasons. These talented individuals have been marred by off-field problems all season, and it must be a sad day for them. Their collegiate careers ended without spectacle or pomp; these are two men who should be worried about where they are being drafted, not if they are. It's sad to see such a waste of God-given talent, both for the team and for the individuals involved.
5.) Zach Miller is as good as gone. Erickson will have to do some major selling, but I think that there is little left for Miller to prove. His receiving numbers are down this season due to Carpenter's poor play coupled with the emergence of the running game, and a new offense will 1) be complicated to install and 2) more than likely feature tight end passes less frequently. Miller still awaits his junior NFL scouting evaluation, but many feel he is a legitimate first round pick based on his blocking and receiving skills. We'll miss you Zach, and thanks for staying home and being a Devil when you could have gone anywhere out of high school.
Additional thumbs down go to Kyle Caldwell's graduation, Zach Catanese's injury, and Jonathan Johnson's shanked punts.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, I'm witty, surrounded by morons, thug life
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
See, He's Loyal!
For a guy branded as unloyal, this hire is puzzling.
New Sun Devil head coach Dennis Erickson announced late yesterday that his long-time assistant Rich Olson will be the offensive coordinator next year at ASU. Olson has been at the helm of some of the most un-powerhouselike offenses of this century, including the 2006 Miami Hurricanes and the 2001 & 2002 Arizona Cardinals. I'm not exactly creaming my pants about this one, with visions of dink and dunk passes into the flat for negative yardage dancing in my head. Erickson is also bringing Dan Cozzetto back to Tempe, a guy that ran the Sun Devil offense for Bruce Snyder from 1993 to 1999 and worked with Erickson in Corvallis. Coach Coz was a player favorite who is remembered for his passion and fire.
ASU has been burdened in the past with this type of coach-loyalty syndrome, watching Brent Guy captain a sub par 4-2-5 defense for far too long in Tempe before leaving for his own head coaching job (?!) at Utah State. Let's just say he hasn't exactly set the world on fire there, either. Koetter was also erroneous in the minds of many for his incredible loyalty to special teams coach Tom Osborne, even after all of the kicking gaffes that tanked games in 2004 and 2005, most notably the post-Katrina miracle LSU was able to pull off. In another instance, rather than point to a need for better coaching, Koetter threw punter Chris MacDonald under the bus in a press conference by saying that his motion and approach was the reason for so many blocked punts. It couldn't have had anything to do with the shield formation that allows defenders the opportunity to get a running start at the kicker, could it? After losing his punting job at ASU, C-Mac transferred to Texas State and is doing quite well from what I hear.
I tried to find footage of the 2005 ASU-LSU game, but this will have to suffice in it's stead. Fun stuff.
I guess the point of all of this is that ASU should be "Country Club U" for recruits, but not for coaches. There is a lot of work to be done and this AARP buddy system of staffing doesn't thrill me. Erickson should make the effort to surround himself with the best minds in the game, not necessarily his golfing buddies. I dread the thought of ASU becoming the NFL Cardinals of the NCAA, "Where coaches come to die."
Having said all of that, I'll wait for results on the field of play before I further denounce this action. In Dennis we trust! (why do I feel creepy saying that?)
New Sun Devil head coach Dennis Erickson announced late yesterday that his long-time assistant Rich Olson will be the offensive coordinator next year at ASU. Olson has been at the helm of some of the most un-powerhouselike offenses of this century, including the 2006 Miami Hurricanes and the 2001 & 2002 Arizona Cardinals. I'm not exactly creaming my pants about this one, with visions of dink and dunk passes into the flat for negative yardage dancing in my head. Erickson is also bringing Dan Cozzetto back to Tempe, a guy that ran the Sun Devil offense for Bruce Snyder from 1993 to 1999 and worked with Erickson in Corvallis. Coach Coz was a player favorite who is remembered for his passion and fire.
ASU has been burdened in the past with this type of coach-loyalty syndrome, watching Brent Guy captain a sub par 4-2-5 defense for far too long in Tempe before leaving for his own head coaching job (?!) at Utah State. Let's just say he hasn't exactly set the world on fire there, either. Koetter was also erroneous in the minds of many for his incredible loyalty to special teams coach Tom Osborne, even after all of the kicking gaffes that tanked games in 2004 and 2005, most notably the post-Katrina miracle LSU was able to pull off. In another instance, rather than point to a need for better coaching, Koetter threw punter Chris MacDonald under the bus in a press conference by saying that his motion and approach was the reason for so many blocked punts. It couldn't have had anything to do with the shield formation that allows defenders the opportunity to get a running start at the kicker, could it? After losing his punting job at ASU, C-Mac transferred to Texas State and is doing quite well from what I hear.
I tried to find footage of the 2005 ASU-LSU game, but this will have to suffice in it's stead. Fun stuff.
I guess the point of all of this is that ASU should be "Country Club U" for recruits, but not for coaches. There is a lot of work to be done and this AARP buddy system of staffing doesn't thrill me. Erickson should make the effort to surround himself with the best minds in the game, not necessarily his golfing buddies. I dread the thought of ASU becoming the NFL Cardinals of the NCAA, "Where coaches come to die."
Having said all of that, I'll wait for results on the field of play before I further denounce this action. In Dennis we trust! (why do I feel creepy saying that?)
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, rivalry rants, surrounded by morons, the new era, UA morons
Sunday, December 10, 2006
Erickson's Here
...and it's onward to victory!Of the available choices, he was the best fit for the position. While I can't really agree with the firing of Dirk Koetter after perusing the candidate pool two weeks ago, Dennis Erickson should more than relieve Koetter's shortcomings.
DK: Soft defenses
DE: Angry malicious defenses that hit like freight trains and laugh at the opposition's pain
DK: Leads league in penalties, mostly mental and procedural
DE: Leads league in penalties, mostly agressive and celebratory
DK: Can't seem to close out games against good teams, even with seemingly solid leads
DE: The kind of guy that, after hitting an animal with his car, will back up a few times to make sure it's dead
DK: Players were occasionally thuggish off the field but polite on the gridiron
DE: Thug life, 24-7!
I'm using a wait-and-see aproach with regards to games 1) in California, 2) against ranked teams, and 3) against teams from Tucson. The few that miss Koetter will point to his 4-2 record against the Cats, although there is no reason we should have lost any of these games against arguably some of the worst UA teams in 100+ years. Erickson is 7-2 lifetime against them, even though the biggest hole in his resume is a 29-0 loss to UA in the 1992 Fiesta Bowl. I'll take him, either way.
Erickson's detractors are quick to point to the thug reputation that his Miami and Oregon State garnered during his reign, but I'm not convinced. His Beaver team that most remember is the one that kicked Notre Dame square in the ass in the 2001 Fiesta Bowl and racked up 174 penalty yards. Most of these penalties came as personal fouls, yes, but they were celebration penalties. I'd give anything to have those kind of high-class problems at ASU and besides, you try shutting up Chad Johnson. To be honest, the Sun Devils could use a little attitude.
At Miami, this kind of behavior is more the rule than the exception, so no one can make much of a stink on that one. The problem here is that Erickson unjustly receives blame for the probation Miami endured in the mid 1990's. A man who was not not employed the athletic department was falsifying documents for 50+ athetes of several sports, not just football players, to illegally receive Pell Grants. While you can argue a "lack of institutional control" or "not knowing what his players are doing," this kind of logic caused maroon and gold lynch mobs to form after the Arizona Republic insinuated that the tragic death of Brandon Faulkner was somehow Dirk Koetter's fault. Total horsepoopy.
Let's also be sure to jump all over him for getting a DUI in 1995. Oooooo, how evil. What kind of a sick bastard would ever drive drunk? Dude it happens, let it go. It's not going to be bumper cars on Mill Avenue or anything. I think he'll fit in just fine at one of the nation's top party schools.
Welcome, Coach Erickson. Hope springs eternal.
DK: Soft defenses
DE: Angry malicious defenses that hit like freight trains and laugh at the opposition's pain
DK: Leads league in penalties, mostly mental and procedural
DE: Leads league in penalties, mostly agressive and celebratory
DK: Can't seem to close out games against good teams, even with seemingly solid leads
DE: The kind of guy that, after hitting an animal with his car, will back up a few times to make sure it's dead
DK: Players were occasionally thuggish off the field but polite on the gridiron
DE: Thug life, 24-7!
I'm using a wait-and-see aproach with regards to games 1) in California, 2) against ranked teams, and 3) against teams from Tucson. The few that miss Koetter will point to his 4-2 record against the Cats, although there is no reason we should have lost any of these games against arguably some of the worst UA teams in 100+ years. Erickson is 7-2 lifetime against them, even though the biggest hole in his resume is a 29-0 loss to UA in the 1992 Fiesta Bowl. I'll take him, either way.
Erickson's detractors are quick to point to the thug reputation that his Miami and Oregon State garnered during his reign, but I'm not convinced. His Beaver team that most remember is the one that kicked Notre Dame square in the ass in the 2001 Fiesta Bowl and racked up 174 penalty yards. Most of these penalties came as personal fouls, yes, but they were celebration penalties. I'd give anything to have those kind of high-class problems at ASU and besides, you try shutting up Chad Johnson. To be honest, the Sun Devils could use a little attitude.
At Miami, this kind of behavior is more the rule than the exception, so no one can make much of a stink on that one. The problem here is that Erickson unjustly receives blame for the probation Miami endured in the mid 1990's. A man who was not not employed the athletic department was falsifying documents for 50+ athetes of several sports, not just football players, to illegally receive Pell Grants. While you can argue a "lack of institutional control" or "not knowing what his players are doing," this kind of logic caused maroon and gold lynch mobs to form after the Arizona Republic insinuated that the tragic death of Brandon Faulkner was somehow Dirk Koetter's fault. Total horsepoopy.
Let's also be sure to jump all over him for getting a DUI in 1995. Oooooo, how evil. What kind of a sick bastard would ever drive drunk? Dude it happens, let it go. It's not going to be bumper cars on Mill Avenue or anything. I think he'll fit in just fine at one of the nation's top party schools.
Welcome, Coach Erickson. Hope springs eternal.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, surrounded by morons, the new era, thug life
Saturday, November 18, 2006
Here We Go...
Rivalry week. There should be enough venom spewed to fill the Colorado River as the teams head into Saturday's matchup with identical records for the first time since 2000, a game you may remember by PLACEKICKER Mike Barth's run up the middle for a touchdown. The red-blue bastards are playing for more than pride for the first time in he Bush administration, and that honestly scares the bejeezus out of me, especially since they've won three in a row and ASU seems to be in some sort of meltdown/quit-on-the-coach mode. We thought we were past that after taking care of business against Washington State, but 2006 reared it's ugly head again on Saturday night as the Devils fell to UCLA 24-12. Props to the Bruin run defense that lived up to all of the hype, stuffing ASU in the red zone more times than I care to remember, playing hard in the clutch when it really counted. Once again the Koetter offense displayed it's biggest flaw, displaying that a scheme predicated on stretching the defense downfield does little inside of the opponent's ten yard line. It's do or die time for Coach K: a win this weekend and you can crash here, but a loss means you gotta get yo shit and go. We'll discuss available coaching options should the need arise, but for now let's reminisce on a great Sun Devil rivalry moment- 1974, and "The Catch" by John Jefferson.
Labels: ASU alumni, Dirk's a horse's ass, rivalry rants, UA morons
Friday, November 10, 2006
OH MY FREAKING GOD
From a very reliable source...
Dude... scary. You may be familiar with the story because of the new Matthew McConaughey vehicle We Are Marshall. Numerology is spooky, even if it doesn't pan out every time, like the whole years ending with "6" thing in the Pac-10.
Speaking of numerology, the Devils play the Washington State Cougars today in the middle of what is being hailed as "Champions Weekend." ASU will honor its 1986 and 1996 Pac-10 championship teams during halftime of Saturday's game, but here's the catch: neither of those teams beat Wazzu. Huh!? The '86 squad that finished 10-1-1 tied WSU while the '96 counterpart, although undefeated in the regular season, didn't play the Cougs that year. This does not look good for Devil fans, and I'm thinking that the stands won't look too good either. The program hasn't reached total apathy yet since everyone seems to want Dirk's head on a platter, but it's close. The fair weather folk of the valley have already turned to the Suns and ***gasp!*** ASU basketball's new regime, so don't expect more than 50,000 in attendance at kickoff. I haven't a clue as to what those people will see since I'm not really sure which ASU team will show up:
a.) the relentless team that poured it on against Nevada and Stanford
b.) the team that show fight and heart against USC and Washington
c.) The other one you may have seen against Oregon State, Oregon, and Cal.
I'm really worried that like many fans, the team has given up on Coach Koetter. I hope I'm wrong, but I'm glad it won't be televised.
Go Devils!
Thanks again Pat, and happy Veteran's Day.
A CHARTER PLANE CARRYING THE MARSHALL FOOTBALL TEAM HAD TO BE EVACUATED BEFORE TAKEOFF ON THE RUNWAY TODAY IN CEREDO, WEST VIRGINIA.
SMOKE WAS REPORTED IN THE ENGINE, BUT NO ONE WAS INJURED DURING THE EVACUATION.
THIS INCIDENT COMES ALMOST 36 YEARS TO THE DAY WHEN ALMOST ALL THE MARSHALL FOOTBALL TEAM WAS KILLED IN A PLANE CRASH ON NOVEMBER 14, 1970.
TODAY'S TEAM WAS TRAVELING TO EAST CAROLINA UNIVERSITY, THE SAME SCHOOL THE 1970 TEAM WAS COMING HOME FROM WHEN THEY CRASHED.
Dude... scary. You may be familiar with the story because of the new Matthew McConaughey vehicle We Are Marshall. Numerology is spooky, even if it doesn't pan out every time, like the whole years ending with "6" thing in the Pac-10.
Speaking of numerology, the Devils play the Washington State Cougars today in the middle of what is being hailed as "Champions Weekend." ASU will honor its 1986 and 1996 Pac-10 championship teams during halftime of Saturday's game, but here's the catch: neither of those teams beat Wazzu. Huh!? The '86 squad that finished 10-1-1 tied WSU while the '96 counterpart, although undefeated in the regular season, didn't play the Cougs that year. This does not look good for Devil fans, and I'm thinking that the stands won't look too good either. The program hasn't reached total apathy yet since everyone seems to want Dirk's head on a platter, but it's close. The fair weather folk of the valley have already turned to the Suns and ***gasp!*** ASU basketball's new regime, so don't expect more than 50,000 in attendance at kickoff. I haven't a clue as to what those people will see since I'm not really sure which ASU team will show up:
a.) the relentless team that poured it on against Nevada and Stanford
b.) the team that show fight and heart against USC and Washington
c.) The other one you may have seen against Oregon State, Oregon, and Cal.
I'm really worried that like many fans, the team has given up on Coach Koetter. I hope I'm wrong, but I'm glad it won't be televised.
Go Devils!
Thanks again Pat, and happy Veteran's Day.Labels: ASU alumni, Dirk's a horse's ass, movie references
Monday, November 06, 2006
At least he can beat a ranked opponent.
On the road, no less.Here's a link since I'm sure the picture will suck.
I'm not really all that interested in how the Devils play this Saturday against Washington State. The following week's matchup against UCLA doesn't really entice me all that much either. There is only one goal left for the 2006 ASU football season, and it has nothing to do with a bowl. Defeat UA in Tucson. Nothing more, nothing less.
In good news, Rudy Fucking Burgess may be moved back to wide receiver after injuries to Nate Kimbrough and Mike Jones occurred on Saturday, not to mention ANOTHER suspension of flanker Jamaal Lewis. All of a sudden ASU is thinner at WR than they are at corner. Please do not search the tHOH archives to see how stupid predictions of this unit were.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, message board nonsense, rivalry rants, Rudy Fucking Burgess, thug life, UA morons
Saturday, November 04, 2006
Devils Denied By Beavers (get your mind out of the gutter)
I, like OSU quarterback Matt Moore, recognize what an easy target Keno Walter-White is.My thoughts on today's transactions have been summed up in one short statement by a man calling himself "Jeddevil." You'll see it on the banner of the blog page until ASU wins or U of A loses. Sadly enough, I'm not even sure when that's going to happen. Ok that's total BS, the kitties will lose to Cal next week. The point is, not much more could have gone wrong today. Let's see how my favorite teams fared today:
1) ASU- loses 44-10 to Oregon State, more on that later.
2) Washington State (aka whoever's playing U of A)- loses by 10 to a team that has a moral victory when they reach positive rushing yards.
3) Florida State- Wins convincingly, against a team I despise no less. A sunny spot in an otherwise cloudy day.4) Oklahoma- Wins, but taken to the wire and nearly Bomar'd themselves (again) with a timeout that occured a split second before a converted 4th and inches on their OWN 30 yard line with a one point lead and 90 seconds remaining. Maybe he really is related to the bumbling Tucson counterpart (or Dirk).
It's gotten so bad on the homefront that they're selling t-shirts online now. Quite witty indeed, and I'll follow that up with the obligatory post-loss link to BenchKoetter.com. Lo and behold, it has spawned! two websites for the same cause, now we need to start the buyout slush fund. I got ten bucks! I'd also like to call shotgun as the conductor of the "Hire Butch Davis Express." Remember the sales pitch from when I was screaming for us to dump Dirk and go after Spurrier:
1) Warm climate
2) Sunshine/world class golf 360 days a year
3) Athletic talent available, simply unmotivated
4) Fishing at nearby lake Apache
5) Easily dominated in-state rival
6) Big school, great facilities
You have to lure the good ol' boys out west somehow. I have, however, found a solution for all of this nastiness. they sell it at Target and other retailers, and you've probably seen it- it's the bucket-o-cocktail that needs nothing more than a bottle of vodka and a few hours in the freezer. If you use a liter instead of a fifth, it makes for a whopping good time. Wheee!
***randon fun nugget! Best gameday sign: a Texas A&M student had one that read "Pop your Collar For Adrian Peterson!" Brilliant minds in College Station, even if karma dictated their loss today.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, I'm witty, message board nonsense, regular old crackers
Sunday, October 29, 2006
ASU Gets The W (Thank God)
Whew, that was a close one. After coming out of the tunnel strongly and getting out to a 20-6 lead early in the fourth quarter, the Sun Devils gave us another one of those oh shit, not again moments with a dropped snap on an extra point attempt. The bad juju from yet another Rudy Carpenter fuck-up carried over to piss-poor offensive play, a shanked punt, an avalanche of penalties, and the loss of yet another Hell Hog Stephen Berg for the year. The defense came together when it really counted, though, and Arizona State was able to escape the jaws of their own shortcomings and get a much needed win.The Good
Everything on offense, for starters. Carp had yet another 2005-like efficient day going 16-23 and no interceptions for the second game in a row. Ryan Torain had a strengthy day with 99 yards on 23 carries to raise what looks like a decent 2008 draft stock, even though Keegan Herring stole the show with his 65-yard touchdown run on a toss play that was just added to the playbook this week. The team played with passion an a sense of urgency, something some are crediting to a fiery speech given by offensive line coach Brent Myers that was inspired by one of his favorite contemporary Christian songs. Yeah, I'm just as shocked as you are on that one. Good to see someone on the coaching staff stepping it up, even if Koetter pisses on the idea in front of the press.
“Nothing against Coach Myers, but players have to play,” Koetter said. “No speech carries over for a whole game, I don’t care if it’s Knute Rockne, Vince Lombardi, Brent Myers or Dirk Koetter. It was a hell of a speech, but speeches are overrated.”Just take the win and say thank you. Ass.
Coach Myers: Does this guy know how to party or what?!Additional kudos to the D for playing big when it counted, and a big slap on the ass for Josh Barrett who had nine tackles and two interceptions that may very well have made the difference in the outcome of this game.
The Bad
Well, there's the fourth quarter breakdown where the team assumed victory or whatever happened to scare the piss ot of me. Playing four quarters of solid, fundamental football has been a challenge for Sun Devil football as far back as I care to remember and I don't know where to start to mend this problem; it is as ingrained into Sun Devil Stadium as sunburn and underage drinking. Jonathan Johnson shanked a punt and Jesse Ainsworth still can't hit a kick of more than 35 yards. This may come back to haunt this team (I feel like I've said this before), and it almost did on Saturday. Big thumbs down to yours truly for overhyping the arrival of Kyle Williams, who made a debut of Mike Williams proportions by dropping his first kickoff return and getting the Devils pinned deep in Husky territory. He did catch one pass for two yards, though. Woop-tee-frickin-doo.
The Ugly
Penalties. Aaaarrrrgh! WTF? How do you fix a problem as chronic as this one? The Devils are at/near the top of the national list of penalized teams. I'm stunned on this one- 16 of them for 122 yards. Just by comparison, Washington had 126 yards...of RUSHING. Also horrifying to see offensive lineman Stephen Berg out for the year with a knee injury, joining roommate and fellow senior hog Andrew Carnahan on the short list of players that will never play for the Sun Devils again. It really is a shame for these guys, particularly for any hopes of an NFL career. Barring a decision of reason and sympahy by the NCAA (not bloody likely) to grant a 6th year of eligibility, they are joined by Zach Krula, another hog with health issues dating back to last year. These three shoud be the anchors of the best line in the Pac-10, but bad fortune has reared its ugly head. *single tear*Labels: ASU alumni, Dirk's a horse's ass, surrounded by morons
Friday, October 27, 2006
True Frosh To Start At Wideout
Last year's Arizona high school player of the Year Kyle Williams will see the playing field for the first time in his collegiate career on saturday as he shoots from the scout team to a starting position at wide receiver against the Huskies. He's a little fella at 5'10", but was a monster on kick returns and as an all-purpose back, scoring 30 TD's for Chapparal High School in his senior year. His proud papa Ken is the GM for YOUR world champion Chicago White Sox, and Kyle is expected to play baseball for the Sun Devils alongside apparently underacheiving WR/centerfielder Mike Jones.
The common comparison of Kyle WIlliams is to former Sun Devil and local product Shaun McDonald. Williams is a few inches taller and a step slower than Lil' Shaun, but some have said that he has "that ability" to create separation downfield, along with tremendous vision and the ability to run towards daylight. He was recruited specifically to play the deep threat WR in Koetter's system and has looked good in practices this week. (big thanks to JohnB. from the Ranch) I know the picture is a little blurry; it's because he's too fast to be caught on film. It's creepy though, he actually looks a little like McDonald.
The common comparison of Kyle WIlliams is to former Sun Devil and local product Shaun McDonald. Williams is a few inches taller and a step slower than Lil' Shaun, but some have said that he has "that ability" to create separation downfield, along with tremendous vision and the ability to run towards daylight. He was recruited specifically to play the deep threat WR in Koetter's system and has looked good in practices this week. (big thanks to JohnB. from the Ranch) I know the picture is a little blurry; it's because he's too fast to be caught on film. It's creepy though, he actually looks a little like McDonald.
Keep your eyes on #6 tomorrow.
Many expect Williams to fill the returner hole vacated by senior Terry Richardson, who suffered a knee injury late in last Thursday's practice. If Carpenter can connect with him on a deep route early in the game, monster running back Ryan Torain could have a career day against UW, since our last several opponents have been cheating ther safeties up knowing full well that Carp couldn't/wasn't allowed to throw a deep ball. The season and a decent bowl bid are still salvagable, and while I'm skeptical of Koetter burning this talented kid's redshirt so late in the season I admire Koetter's stance of putting the best players on the field despite their class ranking. This may come off as a desparate attempt to save his own job, but it's probably good for Dirk to have to think that way every once in awhile. What the hell, it worked against Arizona last year. Have I mentioned how much I love this video?
Labels: ASU alumni, Dirk's a horse's ass, rivalry rants
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Here Come The Huskies...
Now rip off their heads and shit down their necks!This weekend's matchup in Seattle between the Sun Devils and the Huskies appears to be a must-win for both teams. U-Dub is no longer the pushover they have been since slick Rick Neuheisel left town several years ago, and ASU will have their hands full. Most of the rest of us figured all hope for the Huskies was lost when starting senior quarterback and athletic freak Isiah Stanback was injured and deemed unavailable for the remainder of the year, but young gun Carl Bonnell stepped in to his place admirably to give a serious challenge to Cal last week, barely falling in overtime. Remember the Bears? Yeah, I think they just scored against ASU again. While his poise was admirable, remember that Bonnell threw 5 interceptions, including the forced pass that was returned for the game-winning TD in overtime. Heads up, Devil D.
Rudy Carpenter had probably his most efficient game as a Sun Devil last week, even if it was against Stanford. He completed 14 of 15 passes, and surely could have done more had the need arisen. Nitpickers wll attest that he missed (as in never saw) many an open receiver downfield that could have been completed for big gains, particularly when he tucked the ball and scrambled. Carp and Dirk are both towing the company line when being grilled by the media. The first quote comes from Koetter during a Monday presser after being asked about opening up the offense:
“This isn’t last year. We just have a different make up of our team right now. I have always been comfortable opening up the offense, but I also think that we have to be smart. Opening our offense can also lead to turnovers and the best thing we did (against Stanford) is not turn the ball over."
Wow, our coach has really regressed this season. He used to be regarded as an arrogant, righteous prick, and now he's a backpedaling softie: first the QB flip-flop thing, and now he's afraid to throw the ball. He's making the most critical error in competitive sports, which is playing not to lose rather than playing to win. This does not bode well for the rest of the season or Koetter's job security. Carpenter echoed his sentiments, and for some reason I feel a lot better when he says it.
"...if I miss some open guys I miss some open guys. I’m going to try to make sure every play is a positive play and we're not losing yards and sometimes I make it up so quick by running it and it’s been effective, so I’m going to keep on doing it.”
Works for me. The fact is, however, that this year's squad is now a running team that will only go as far as Ryan Torain can carry the rest of them. Unfortunately the receivers haven't been all that up to snuff, which has probably caused Carp some undue flack from hacks like me (don't forget this one, too) over the past few weeks. Not saying he was innocent by any stretch of the imagination, but Rudy B's injuries, Jamaal Lewis' suspension/ineffectiveness, Terry Richardson's sucktacular year, and the youthful/inexperienced play of Mike Jones, Nate Kimbrough, and Chris McGaha haven't helped Carpenter's play or confidence. Carp can't put the ball on the spot if the spot isn't where it' supposed to be.In the good news department, the defense really has been holding their own since having their doors blown off by Oregon. The bye week did just as it was supposed to, which was to renew the legs and refresh the spirit of the players. This was obviously the case after giving up 21 to USC (remember that the other 7 were T-Rich's fault) and holding the Cardinal to 3. I know it was Stanford, but NAU scored 14 in our house. Zach Catanese will not miss any playing time after suffering a mild concussion against Stanford, and he will be counted on to fly around and knock the bejeezus out of any U-Dub ball carriers. With the exception of the Cal-Oregon hiccup, the overall defense really has been improving each week, which is all one can ask from such a young group. They have a chance to make a statement this Saturday in the Devils' first road trip to Seattle since 1999, and should be up to the challenge.
Labels: Dirk's a horse's ass, I'm witty, thug life
